I have goosebumps all over my body, because I just watched the most beautiful, heart-touching New Girl episode to this day. My thoughts and feelings are all over the place, but I am sure to find enough space and time to process them clearly by writing this article. There’s a lot to (un)pack..
A way of life, a way of thinking, a way of living.
He or she who must travel happily must travel light.
I remember watching this one HIMYM episode as if it was yesterday. It opened with Ted explaining his kids that everyone carries baggage with themselves, and that he’s not an exception. Back then, Ted was left at the altar by Elliot, aah, Stella, and that weighted heavily on him. The visualisation of everyone carrying bags or suitcases around felt like as if it opened the third eye of my reflection capabilities. It changed the way I saw my world of struggles, as it gave me a clear indication that I was carrying a jumbojet of problems und unresolved issues with me; no wonder I was struggling so hard at that specific time.
In an effort to get rid of these heavy but empty weights, I followed my own path of self-reflection: therapy, coaching and reading a shitload of books. Self-help, personal development and introspection were all written on my forehead for years. My mom would suggest that I’ve always been looking for something, and that I still am. She would calmly tell you about all the desperate attempts for a clean break, for a reset, a blank sheet. And there is no doubt she was wrong. Moms just seem to figure out their kids, that’s simply what they do.
I’m soon moving into a room in a shared flat. Thinking back to March 2020, when I started this blog, I have to admit that I came closer to my wishful thinking back then, more then I could have ever imagined.
You need to know that I decided to start writing a blog about Nick Miller because I was approaching my 30th birthday, got fired, my girlfriend left me, and I was now alone in a 60m² flat. Long story short: I had a lot of time and nothing to do. The flat was too big for me and it was only logical to move to a shared flat. I was single. New Girl vibes came all over me, I pitched this idea to a friend and started blogging. I decided that writing will, once again, become my passion, my activity to proccess feelings and stay sane.
So I am kind of set, and the next thing for me to do is to decorate my room. Something that gives me a bit of a headache. I’m not talented when it comes to buying stuff, or decorating, and it seems that either my parents, or my ex-girlfriends have always taken care of these things. Perhaps I am exagerrting right now, perhaps just a little bit, but the truth is that I haven’t really spend a lot of time thinking about design, color schemes or announcing to have a room that is furnished according to a theme of my own choice. Too much responsibility!
However, I can’t push away the fact that I will need to furnish my room. In order to get inspired, I started watching a TV-show with the glamorous name “Decoration Queen”. Yup, here I am, watching a TV-Show about 5 contestants (Did you bet only women? You’re right!) decorating a room of their choice with a given budget of 2500€. They rate each other’s efforts, the TV-host (Did you expect a sweet gay designer? Detective Columbo!) rates their efforts too and all of that blends in together perfectly for a 4pm afternoon show I currently watch with my mom. (Yeah I know, I need to move into the shared flat, I’m aware that it’s a bit alarming xD)
However, I am amazed how talented, and since yesterday’s episode, NOT-talented people can be. So I decided to keep it simple — all I need is a bed, a dresser, a desk and plenty of space for my Yoga and meditation things. Not more, not less. How light I travel through life, you might ask?
A clear and strict attitude: Feeling and thinking like Coach
One of the merits of craving for clean breaks is the evolving relationship to materialism. I can tell you from my own experience. I never horded things, but I was always aware that I was dangerously prone to clinging to random little things, finding it hard to throw them away. After all the years of rejecting materialism, presents and other unnecessary things of life, I can spare you with the means but highlight the end: Everything I own has to have a profound meaning and use in my life. And even then, I am aware that I will throw it away whenever I will move places, because they will remind me of that specific chapter of my life.
At first, it might seem and it was a desperate approach to cut myself off from certain people, places or whole chapters of my past. And I have to admit that it took me a while to realize that, admit it and work on that issue; you do remember my self-development obsession, right?
But after a while, I enjoyed the more distant and grounded approach to materialistic things — they won’t make me happy, but they will keep me in the past. Hence, I totally agree with Coach that there are many things that I don’t need to take with me when I move out. I threw away many things from my old flat, and kept very little. I think that all my belongings can fit into a 10m² storage, and there would be enough space for your stuff too (although I am currently not looking for a relationship, ladies)
Concluding this first chapter of comparing myself to a New Girl character, I do understand Coach’s struggle, and I did smile from the bottom of my heart when I saw Winston reminding him of his feelings and how we truly values this chapter of his life that will no be closed for good. Which brings me to..
The goofyness and big heart of Winston Bishop
Winston’s a good guy, a sweet and charming dude who seems to be more comfortable with women. I see my empathetic self in Bishop, as I currently have more female friends than male ones, and the fact that I often find myself in hobbies, activities or workshops where I am one of the few men attending, is again and again a welcome surrounding I feel myself more comfortable with.
It’s hard to say why. Just last night I had a dream about the following situation: I lived in a huge complex with many people, and there were two main events happening in this luxurious house: A big dance party and a boxing training. I finally saw myself finally meeting Bill Simmons, Ryen Russillo, Kyle, Ceruti and Cousin Sal, having a good time, drinking and chatting about life. But suddenly there was a moment in which I felt so displaced. It felt like it was starting to become a shallow conversation, just a couple of dudes talking about sports, women and boxing. I didn’t feel comfortable anylonger. I told them, and left. What a bummer!
So I left for the dancing and the music. Boxing was too tough for me, there was no point for me to punch another guy’s head to dust, and getting the same treatment right after. It felt too rough, too .. I don’t know. So I left for the musical side, the dancing, the music, I even played the guitar in front of others. There, I felt welcome, understood, safe.
It’s like talking to my female friends, with whom I can be myself way better than with male friends. It’s hard to write about this without slipping into clichés right now, that’s why I am just stopping right here.
Winston is caring. He gives a damn about stuff, and not just about his cat, or his growing passion and obsession for birds. He deeply cares, and I love this about him. Which brings us to
Being caring but annoying as hell like Jess
This section in an essence: Jess is her own character. I’m aware there was a time in Hollywood everyone loved Zoey Dechanel, but as I already outlined in my first blog entries: I watched New Girl despite Jess, not because of her. But with this episode, and the accompanying review you’re just reading, I announce a clean break: I do acknowledge Jess’s annoying character and my ever-present resentment towards her, but I let it go. It’s time for me to accept her and embrace her to the fullest.
I’m not doing this because she inevitably comes back together with Nick, and I finally let them do so. (I never had any resentment because I thought of her not to be a worthy partner for my darling Nick, just to be completely sure you get that!) Jess cares, like Winston, but she does so in a more girly-like version than Winston ever could. What took Winston a couple of seasons (and probably a total of 3 hours of character development in a total of almost 100 episodes!!!!!!), Jess brought along from the get go.
As caring, but annoying she was, is, and will be — her optimism and inability to keep a secret ultimately leads to one of the sweetest moments for the sweetest character in the show:
Being a self-obsessed and hopeless romantic like Schmidt
Ach .. what can I say .. I have this one dear friend who is obsessed with Schmidt, and off the opinion that her boyfriend is her own Schmidt.. I’ll just leave it here, haha.
Schmidt believes in love, and given all his douchiness that led him to Faye Muscato, the outer equivalent but inner anti-thesis to Schmidt, writers and audience agree that it’s time for him to live out his romantic, passionate side by proposing to Cece. A love story that was four seasons in the making and finally allowed to continue its natural (serial) path, hand in hand with..
The beautifully lost Cece
Yeah. I wouldn’t dare to say that the only thing that connects me to Cece is our beautiful face x) But perhaps it’s the ongoing development of her character, from obviously good-looking and seemingly shallow model to caring mom — UPS — spoiler alert .. well even up to now she has seen so much change that I don’t need to spoil anything coming up here .. Starting as Schmidt’s trophy but becoming way more, it’s beautiful to watch :-)
While some develop in more obvious ways, some do so in a more nuanced matter, which finally brings us to ..
The pityful poor mess of one Nick Miller
I love him, and I’m still watching episodes mainly focusing on him. What can I say, what haven’t I said yet ..
Moving on to the
humble Deco Queen
Yup, that’s me. After taking this approach, I feel better. I hope you had fun with this article and with season 4. As season 5 is on its way, let’s conclude with the last piece of Nick and Jess
Rivers and Roads song